What is Autism?
Autism is a neurodevelopmental difference, not a problem to fix. (You can read more why we're not trying to fix autism here.) Think about it like a different operating system, a Mac in a PC World (or vice versa, depending on your perspective).
But having a different operating system, than everyone around you, can make just living feel very, very hard. And if the world around you believes that one operating system is the right one? Well, that can be devastating.
Autistic kids and adults might have trouble with:
Our goal isn't to make you look more "normal".
If trying harder to "look normal" was going to work, no one would be in my office. You've probably already tried that, if it worked at all, it was exhausting. Some of my clients simply cannot mask well enough to pass as "neurotypical" in any case.
Instead, first, we want to help you get out of Defense Mode. (You can read more about Defense Mode in articles by Danny Reade, here). We can't expect anyone to do life differently, make different choices, learn new behaviors, from that place of chronic stress and burnout.
But having a different operating system, than everyone around you, can make just living feel very, very hard. And if the world around you believes that one operating system is the right one? Well, that can be devastating.
Autistic kids and adults might have trouble with:
- Meltdowns or shutdowns
- Masking during the day, then crashing at home
- Struggling with change and transition
- Sensory overload
- Social Anxiety
- Feeling disconnected around family or peers
- Having a hard time naming or expressing emotions
- Autistic burnout (or Defense Mode)
Our goal isn't to make you look more "normal".
If trying harder to "look normal" was going to work, no one would be in my office. You've probably already tried that, if it worked at all, it was exhausting. Some of my clients simply cannot mask well enough to pass as "neurotypical" in any case.
Instead, first, we want to help you get out of Defense Mode. (You can read more about Defense Mode in articles by Danny Reade, here). We can't expect anyone to do life differently, make different choices, learn new behaviors, from that place of chronic stress and burnout.
So, do you see kids or adults?
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Both. You don't outgrow autism.
Autistic kids and adults come to my office exhausted from just trying to survive. If you have been trying to follow all the social rules, look "normal", and handle changes in your routine, with fewer "spoons" than anyone else, then you're going to be worn out. "Autistic Burnout" or Defense Mode, can be the result of this chronic level of stress and it can lead to behavior that looks disrespectful or defiant. Anxiety, depression, trauma, and burnout are so common in autistic people, that these are often the reasons that someone finally reaches out to our office. |
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So, what can you do?
First, our goal isn't to make you look more "normal".
If trying harder to "look normal" was going to work, no one would be in my office. You've probably already tried that, if it worked at all, it was exhausting. Some of my clients simply cannot mask well enough to pass as "neurotypical" in any case.
We start with where you are right now. We figure out how many "spoons" you're starting with. We start by finding out what you like doing and enjoy most in the world. We use those hobbies and passions as a starting place to get to know you. We might look at your sensory profile and how it impacts your day-to-day life. We might start by helping "your person" better understand how to be helpful to you.
If trying harder to "look normal" was going to work, no one would be in my office. You've probably already tried that, if it worked at all, it was exhausting. Some of my clients simply cannot mask well enough to pass as "neurotypical" in any case.
We start with where you are right now. We figure out how many "spoons" you're starting with. We start by finding out what you like doing and enjoy most in the world. We use those hobbies and passions as a starting place to get to know you. We might look at your sensory profile and how it impacts your day-to-day life. We might start by helping "your person" better understand how to be helpful to you.
What if You've tried therapy and that didn't work?
So, you're not alone. The way therapists are taught to "do therapy" doesn't actually work for most autistic people. here's what's really cool... we don't have to do just "talk therapy". I offer so many alternatives to traditional "talk therapy", because I've found what works for some doesn't work for others...
Some examples:
Some examples:
- Walk and Talk therapy. Instead of sitting in the office, many of my clients will choose to take a walk around our neighborhood instead. Moving helps them think more clearly and easily.
- Games and Fidgets. Instead of feeling like your therapist is staring at you, sometimes, shifting the focus to a card game or board game, allows conversation to happen more naturally.
- Neurofeedback (also known as Neurological Biofeedback). Allows your brain to see it's own activity while you watch a movie or play a special video game. The incredible thing is... this "feedback" of the screen changing allows the brain to calm itself down, to help it focus better. More on that here.
- Movie therapy. So, this is more "out of the office" movies you watch and then we talk about the movie and how it applies to you, your life, your family, etc. Movies and art provide great metaphors for our lives.
- Bibliotherapy. Basically book therapy, similar to the last one, books can be great to give us information, help, content, perspective, metaphors, etc. And then we discuss in the office.
- Pet Assisted therapy. Our office is lucky enough to have a therapy-dog-in-training, named Mac. He is a three-year old Border Collie and loves to help our clients feel safe and more comfortable. He's been helping me work with clients since he was a puppy.
- Hypnotherapy. Hypnotherapy has a mountain of positive research behind it and I tend to have fantastic results with clients. We usually use this as a way to get past hard things that block you from making progress. This is very different from "stage hypnosis". We're not exploring past lives or making anyone cluck like a chicken.
- EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing). This fascinating therapy helps to break the intense and painful emotional connection that some memories hold for us. Using eye movements or bilateral stimulation, to engage both sides of the brain, your therapist guides you so that you can remember without that emotional charge, without you having to talk about every aspect of the memory.
- Flash (Flash Technique). What if what's bringing you therapy is something you really don't want to talk about, like at all? Flash is an evidence-based approach that helps reduce the distress of painful memories, without needing to talk about or even think about them directly. It was originally developed as part of EMDR and is now found to be very effective on its own.
- Sandtray therapy. This is a particular passion of mine when working with adults. In Sandtray Therapy is for anyone who doesn't like to talk about "feelings". Using a large collection of miniatures, the client builds a representation of their world or experiences in the tray. Sometimes adults feel silly "playing with toys", but usually end up finding that it can be one of the most powerful forms of therapy because of it's visual nature. Children gravitate towards this type of therapy naturally.
